Unspoken words
Rend the heart
Locks the mind
Only wrath remain

Unsheathen swords
Pierce the hearts
Robs the mind
Only joy is slain

Thoughts untoward
Blind the heart
Veil the minds
Only leaves a strain

Leave the card
Bind the hearts
Crippled mind
Only left with pain

Smile again
Never mind
Mended hearts
A brand new start.

Measured footfalls
Step by step
Past the stairwell
The widow wept

On to remains
The empty husk
In hand a spade
For morbid task

Vacant stares
Almost indignant
All the same
Yet each one different

Grab the ankle
Heave and raise
A mindless job
Devoid of praise

Up and over
The rising heap
Almost silent
The final sleep

Pour the oil
Light the fire
Put to flame
The mangled spire

Burn. Burn.
Burn away.
Mayhaps in time
We find our way.

blade at the throat
darkness seeps
purchased soul
in frailty weeps

twice glazed over
an empty stare
one departed
conscience rare

twenty one grams
no more no less
dipped in blood
a pagan crest

a line thus drawn
heaven to core
gradual sinking
since ancient lore

_______

Sure I don’t get paid for it.
Sure it’s only 10 minutes.

But maybe like a mother who thinks her hideous child is actually lookable, I can’t help but feel a little proud that I’ve managed to get selected. Having checked out the competition yesterday, I can’t help but compare. And feel rather left behind.

Well the day of reckoning has yet to come so I won’t be filling this page with 50-cent words, but I just hope it all goes well.

I wonder, really… why do I keep on writing when I see no end nor reason.

Then I pick up a pen. And the mad, mad scribbles and incessant scrawls that flood the page, they somehow convince me that reason isn’t necessary.

And they’re right.

dearly departed
have you known that today is the day
i planned tomorrow

dearly departed
i remember that i
forgot about you

dearly departed
you found that you
lost me

dearly departed
till we see each other again

never.

_______

it’s been a while. much has happened, and i’ve once again taken a plunge.

i freelance now. initially it seemed like a pretty good idea. finally over-time will not be without its rewards. finally i will have time to sit down and do what i’ve always wanted to do. finally i can go and get that elusive degree.

well it’s all gone to the dogs now. bills are piling up, i sleep in more so i don’t have to starve, and my bank account has a grand total of three digits – two of them after the decimal point.

i’m getting things done, but somehow i’m getting nowhere.

maybe i asked for it. and maybe that’s how people grow old, having taken shots. some hits, some misses, and then the final admittance that it wasn’t meant to be.

well. tomorrow is another day. perhaps i should count my blessings and not just those glaring circumstance.

Endless days of heading
Nowhere in particular
Bearing upon returning
Home beyond forever

Thinking just a little
Too much of dream
Like state of whittle
Further than it’d seem

Count the costly
Measure the invisible
Thread ever so gently
Verging on disable

Yes.

_______

It can be that groundbreaking idea, updating my portfolio, writing a good article, bring my nephew out, trying something I’ve never tried. Something.

This week:
I’ve came up with an idea which I think will really fly. By next week I’ll have gathered the necessary contacts to do a decent visualisation.

If you happen to read this, drop me a comment or something. Challenge me. I might take it up.

Uninspired
Just a pain
I conspired
I’m insane

Jekyll hides
Hyde jackals
Schizophied
By my double

Inner scream
Outer smile
Home it seems
Quite a while

Stand on skin
Purple veins
The end begins
A twisted skein

_______

I thought it was interesting and decided to see if I can relate it more to, well, everyone. Perhaps in particular myself. In any case, here’s a Vitruvian Man and a cut and paste excerpt from dictionary.com to make this article seem more intellectual.

A for Atmosphere
at·mos·phere (ăt‘mə-sfîr‘)
n.
An aesthetic quality or effect, especially a distinctive and pleasing one, associated with a particular place.

It should come as no surprise that our surroundings affect us. Why else, then, would we pay $6 bucks for a cup of coffee, avoid going to the dentist like the plague, or get all tingly when in a candlelit place?

Your Desk
We don’t give it much thought, but most of us build an atmosphere around us subconsciously. Other than those who can withstand the drab grey cubicles that our bosses put us in and expect us to be creative, most of us effect some change to where we work or study.

On mine, there is a CyberSpawn, Mario Question Box, the entire Keroro team, a host of books I’ve read, re-read, and forgotten. Add to that inspirational quotes, a pair of furry dice, bright yellow box of tissue paper, too much snacks, and an In/Out tray chock full of magazines. And somehow I manage to get some work done.

If you have some time to spare, check out this quirky (and true) video:
The Common Desk

Outside
I think that the atmosphere created really makes a difference even outside. Like the aforesaid dentist which I used to dread to go, I not-so-recently visited one that was really different. Other than being in a prime spot, it was also beautifully designed aesthetically. The entire experience was like stepping into a spa, complete with aromatherapy and languid fishes.

Beyond Physical
Even the most classy restaurant experience can be ruined by an ill-mannered waiter. How you interact (or even not interact) affects your atmosphere and those of others within your scope. Even online forums have atmospheres that is represented not just by colour scheme and smilies, but also of the content and choice of words used. An extra kind word, a genuine compliment, a warm smile. It all counts.

Action Item:
Do something this week that improves your atmosphere. Play music, put a picture of you cute little nephew, use a screensaver with an inspiring quote, smile more. Little by little, you will see improvements to your life in general. You can trust me on this because I back this promise up with a lifetime money-back guarantee.